No coffee or tea
Is to be sipped by me. For Diet Coke, my heart holds so dear. I wish I employed such else to fill the void, But to my caffeinated regimen, I must adhere. It started out fine, but now I prefer it over wine. It’s starting to become a concern. For breakfast I drink that sweet stuff and think, "How does my stomach not churn?" When my debit card got hacked The nice bank lady had asked, "What purchases did you make recently?" For surely she supposed I must have been hosed As McDonald's I stopped at too frequently. But you must understand! Their Coke is not bland. McDonald’s has got me on lock. For every day goes and my car always slows. Their employees are never in shock. For a mere $1.10, A coke and some zen Is how I pull into my school. And if you decide That this choice you deride, Then you come and teach with no fuel! I don’t want your coffee Or "salted toffee schmoffee." And as for Kombucha, you’re on your own. Just give me my pop, you judgmental sop. When you call it soda, I groan. So my choice has been made, No matter how it’s portrayed. I’m content to jump into the fray. So say what you will. It might make me ill, But McDonald’s Diet Coke is my BAE.
6 Comments
3/2/2017 12:56:51 pm
I'm dying right now. Absolutely dying. I can't even form a cohesive comment right now. This is too much. How the hell did you write this? Have you been working on this since last March?!?!
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Michelle Strezo
3/2/2017 01:33:16 pm
#preach
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I love this with every fiber of my being. So clever. And as a dedicated Diet Pepsi drinker (a 20 oz is my preferred vessel), I totally get it!
3/2/2017 01:33:56 pm
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Natalie
3/3/2017 03:26:04 pm
Only Robyn... :)
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AUTHORReese: Elementary Music Teacher in Chicagoland. Clarinetist and Trumpeter.
I'm writing a Slice of Life every day for the month of March as part of the Slice of Life Challenge. See more at TWO WRITING TEACHERS. MY FAVORITE POSTS |